What are you afraid of? Are you making decisions based on your fears? Does fear control your actions and decisions?
I wish I could say that I’m driven by faith all the time but to be honest you probably won’t meet another person as fearful as I am. Just ask my husband!
My fears.....
- Fear of how I'm going to die (I think of this daily)
- Fear of how my family is going to die (I think of this at least 10 times a day)
- Fear that my kids will be harmed (I'm paralyzed by thought that someone will hurt them)
- Fear of not being able to get to where we want to be as a family (leaves me feeling hopeless everyday)
- Fear that we will never have our own house (We are currently living with parents so my husband could finish school)
- Fear of loosing everything
- Fear of not being in control
- many more!!!
I'm very protective of my kids. I always tell them to slow down when they are running with the fear that they will fall and get hurt. I'm always on the edge when they are at the park doing the monkey bars. My heart pounds every time we are driving in the freeway. My fears hunt me on a daily basis. Can you relate? I often allow my fears to make decisions for me because for some reason I feel "safer".
God reminded me that I'm to live in faith and not in fear. I'm to make decisions based on faith and not in fear. Faith in what? Faith in HIM.
My fears revealed my lack of trust in Him. I'm unable to let go because deep inside I have doubts whether God would really pull through. Maybe because in all honesty, I've been disappointed. Maybe because I've not seen answers to prayer. Perhaps because this season in life right now is dry and I can't hear His voice clear. All these have caused my heart to be in a place where I'm unable to trust Him wholeheartedly. It's one thing to say, " I trust you Lord" and it's another thing to live it daily.
Trusting in Him daily is hard but living in fear is harder. So what will I choose? fear or faith? I was able to honestly tell God how I felt. I was able to tell him when I've been disappointed, hurt and lost.
He then reminded me of all the times that he's been faithful not only in my life but also in His word and in the life of many people I know. I've seen Him work. I've seen Him be faithful. I've seen Him do miracles countless of times. His ways are so simple but so freeing and powerful. I was finally able to let go, repent and ask for strength to trust in Him again.
Some trust in chariots and some in horses, but we trust in the name of the LORD our God. (Psalm 20:7)
I can't say that all my fears are gone but with his strength and love I'm able to choose to trust in Him and have faith in Him daily even when things are still hard. He is faithful. He is powerful. He is loving. Where else can I put my faith and trust? Where else?
What about you? Will you allow fear to control you or would you allow Jesus to show the way to freedom?